My Story
Three life changing choices
“There have been three major, pivotal choices that have shaped my life. When I started painting, when I learnt Transcendental Meditation and when I was coached for the first time. The difference these three interventions have made is beyond measure.
How it all began
I grew up in the suburbs, the lone artist in the family and from an early age I felt distrustful of a lot of the expectation put on me. So, I did what a lot of sensitive people do, I rebelled. Before I knew what was what, I was hurtling along in a familiar pattern of dysfunction, not knowing who I was and what I wanted from life.
The years flew by, and for the best part of a decade, I sang in a punk/trip-hop band, which kept my creative and collaborative skills alive (along with plenty of booze-fueled late nights). Juggling the struggles of working jobs that didn't align with my values, trying to survive difficult relationships and the constant pressure of feeling afraid and overwhelmed, it wasn’t a great surprise to find myself having a breakdown in my early 30s.
I choose to see, I choose to feel
The next time, the pressure got too much, I made a different choice. I chose to paint. I painted out, in my own abstract way, what I was struggling with. I asked for help, and it came through in the layers of the painting, in the experience of opening myself to what was possible. I had activated my innerworld and it was ready to show me the way forward.
I went from teaching art in the fringes of the UK mainstream secondary school system to becoming a freelance artist supporting critically acclaimed social justice projects; to Art Director of an award-winning Community Interest Company (C.I.C); to training as a Relational Dynamic Coach and Meditation Teacher.
Creative life
Every area of my life started to improve, and my confidence grew. My creativity became more bold. I started doing presentations and speaking in public, things I'd found so difficult before; including exhibiting my paintings, blogging and performance art. It was around this time I was accepted on a scholarship to train as a life coach and I’ve been working with individuals and groups since 2018.
What now?
I know whatever happens…from a point of conscious awareness…no matter what the challenge… It is all workable. I’ve experienced that there is a gift in every obstacle and that creativity is the flow that both reveals and transforms.
Many of us yearn for change, yet we don’t allow our conscious mind and our inner world to be in relationship. It’s easy to get stuck in the limitations of habitual, linear thinking. Conscious creative expression, for me, has brought balance. What I’ve learnt is, that we can’t push life to be something that we ourselves are not. We need the opportunity to grow into ourselves in a way that most of us have never been shown how to do. Walking this path of expansion and awareness through our innate creativity brings us home to who we are.